Valerie

Oh, Valerie – you adorable little pudding pie. Your random, completely a-propos-of-nothing comments are a thing to behold. Truly.

 

(05:36:07 PM) Valerie May: If you want to take a nap under your cube, you can use my blanket. It’s super soft. I also have a couple of plushies you can use a pillow.

 

(09:18:53 PM) Valerie May: I was going to bring in some bunny treats. But, on one really seems to like pretzels.

 

(09:52:15 PM) Valerie May: I love lemons. I could eat a lemon. Just a lemon. Almost like a hand fruit. Just with out the peal. I can then use the peal for zesting. Lemons are prefect.

 

(09:54:49 PM) Valerie May: What is really good is a raspberry cake with a cream cheese frosting and candied lemon peal. Also, raspberry pie with a little lemon zest.
(09:54:57 PM) Valerie May: This is what I think about when I sleep.

 

Because Valerie provides endless entertainment, I decided to try flipping random comments back at her. She didn’t even blink.

 

(10:14:18 PM) edar: i had a hamster once
(10:15:27 PM) Valerie May: So did I.
(10:15:54 PM) edar: contrary to popular belief, pandas are not large raccoons.
(10:17:57 PM) Valerie May: I would kill for a red panda.
(10:18:22 PM) edar: red pandas are awesome
(10:23:15 PM) Valerie May: I love watching the videos of them playing around in the snow
(10:35:57 PM) edar: The Canary Islands are named after a dog

 

(10:39:23 PM) Valerie May: I have a balcony squirrel I feed.

 

(10:42:27 PM) Valerie May: In one of my cooking classes, I ended up making a fruit tart. I had full intentions on sharing it. That was until I tasted the finished product.

(10:42:51 PM) edar: sometimes i wish i were a dolphin. a blue one.

(10:43:35 PM) Valerie May: Why a dolphin?
(10:44:13 PM) edar: i really like blue
(10:45:34 PM) edar: this kid i knew in high school played the flute.
(10:45:51 PM) Valerie May: I love the flute.
(10:45:57 PM) Valerie May: I can’t play anything.
(10:48:35 PM) Valerie May: My sister was born on Halloween.
(10:49:06 PM) edar: During World War II, the very first bomb dropped on Berlin by the Allies killed the only elephant in the Berlin Zoo.
(10:50:14 PM) Valerie May: Oh.. That’s not cool.
(10:53:43 PM) Valerie May: Sometimes I go to disk traders, go to their $2-$3 movie section and grab a few dvds.
(10:55:12 PM) edar: sometimes I go to meijer and get the food I need to eat for the week
(10:55:29 PM) Valerie May: Why would you do something as crazy like that?
(10:55:35 PM) Valerie May: That is just really, really weird.
(10:55:51 PM) edar: call me nuts
(10:56:08 PM) Valerie May: I was always under the impression that you either filter feed, or you survive only on tea leaves.
(10:56:21 PM) edar: fair point

(11:00:49 PM) Valerie May: What is your favorite tea?
(11:01:40 PM) edar: i’m bad at favorites, i like many things for many different reasons, so it’s all contextual.
(11:01:44 PM) edar: but i’m going to go with white heroin
(11:02:20 PM) Valerie May: What temperature do you need to brew that? 180?
(11:02:35 PM) edar: mostly i grind it up and snort it
(11:02:40 PM) edar: doing it wrong, but w/e
(11:03:35 PM) Valerie May: I feel like that would cause a sinus infection.
(11:04:15 PM) Valerie May: It should dissolve in water like matcha powder. Who knows. You could microwave a cup of milk and try it with that too.
(11:04:50 PM) Valerie May: Oh. I found this yam tea.

 

(11:05:34 PM) Valerie May: I made a sticky
(11:05:55 PM) edar: is that your code word for poop?
(11:06:11 PM) Valerie May: Maybe.

 

(11:09:47 PM) Valerie May: I want through a lotion phase, and I just bought a lot of lotion.

 

(11:13:21 PM) Valerie May: I love cheese.
(11:19:39 PM) Valerie May: I also love chocolate.

 

(11:49:13 PM) Valerie May: Like musicals?

(11:50:50 PM) edar: ever been in a turkish prison?

 

(07:02:47 PM) Valerie May: I used to hate garlic. Then, I started to put it on everything. I swear. I smelled like garlic for a week after.

 

(07:10:46 PM) Valerie May: When I was younger, my grandma would do an easter egg hunt for my sister and I. But, she put a V or S on all of the eggs so they were even between us.
(07:11:38 PM) edar: my great-grandfather’s last words to his wife were, “the shotgun is in the closet; why don’t you go use it?”

she did.
(07:11:43 PM) edar: my family stories are not as fun as yours.

 


(11:47:10 PM) Valerie May: Avest really likes milk tea.

 

(08:59:07 PM) Valerie May: Do you want to see me get drunk tonight?

 

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  2 comments for “Valerie

  1. chalupa
    April 18, 2015 at 7:38 am

    BWAHAHAHA Talk bout random…..
    “What teperature do you need to brew that at?” “I made a sticky”

  2. jen
    December 7, 2016 at 2:30 pm

    i think this might be my favorite post in the history of ever.
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    yes i am all over your blog cuz i just have that kind of time.

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